Kill Meee...KEEEEEELLLL MEEEEE!

These poor dogs...

Needs a home.

Not because They're being abused...

...and not because They're being neglected.

It's because Their owner...

makes and then dresses them in this crap.

Will you sponsor a pup in need today?

What Mort? Couldn't afford to get her a full vest?

They couldn't even be bothered to style it with a shirt under it.  Or at least a cami?  Not even all the colors in the Gay Rainbow could straighten out this hot mess.

My Gramma Made It.

Dressing like a Grown-Up

you're doing it wrong.

I ♥ The 70's

I would like to give a shout-out to Cheezeburger.com's

"Poorly Dressed People of the World" for this.

Reminding us that Crochet has come a loooong way, baby.

Go Lions!!

I take personal pain in posting this because the colors used in this are that of my High School...but...

it's like someone decided last minute to whip this up for their grandchild who was excited to go to their big brother's Football Game.

How NOT to Make a Sweater

It wasn't cute in the 70's.  It wasn't any cuter in the 80's.
So what makes creating a garment of ANY motif a
SMART IDEA?

PSYCHOdelic

She's wearing a homemade get-up and bearing her teeth.

Men, be afraid.  This is a no pick-up zone.

No-More Middle Man

Now, I try not to make fun of anyone's direct pattern posting from their own blog sites, but I'm making an exception for this piece I found on Ravelry.  I saw this while browsing around for random cool stuff and found this.  Of course, getting over being sick, I couldn't help but have this first cynical thought...
"Sweet!  You can skip the HOLDING your wine-glass, tripping, then spilling it on your $500 white cocktail dress and just have it do it ON IT'S OWN!"...nice.

Oooookaayyy.... O.o

you do realize that all they did was just chain a bazillion and probably thought "That doesn't look like a good waste of yarn."  Believe me.  There was a reason why they took this picture at a distance.  It's not that cool looking.

This is Just TOO Good!!

Oh please oh please oh PLEASE tell me this girl is going to an interview with these things on!!
HOW CAN YOU LOOK HER IN THE EYE, LET ALONE TAKE HER SERIOUSLY??

**thank you, oh merciful God.  I needed that laugh today!**

Inspired by Stevie Nicks...the freakier version.

Hmmm...can't decide on either

"Hippie Fail" or "Raggedy Mess"

OMG!! The Snuggie Craze NEEDS to stop!!

No.

NO!

NO NO NO!!!

WTF?!

OMG!!  When it gets to the point that this Bitch TRULY has everything, 

then the Snuggie Phase HAS to end.  There is no excuse for this.

Ribbon Yarn IS Expensive...

 

It's okay sweetheart.  That ribbon-yarn stuff is expensive.  So you wear that 1 skein wonder with 

THRIFTY PRIDE baby!!

Will You Marry Me at Walmart?

 

Because you KNOW that's where he got that ring if his mom had to crochet the ring box he's proposing to you with.

m + u = stalker

I was almost hoping she had her "boyfriend's" name in those BIG RED letters.  That would have made this picture more EVEN MORE CREEPY!!!!

The Crochet of Forrest Gump

Posting a day early for VALENTINE'S!!

For those of you who don't have a Valentine, here is mine to you...

MAKE YOUR OWN CHOCOLATES!!

Not having a life is like a box of Amigarumi Choc-o-lates.   It means you aren't getting any THIS year, either.

Does This Scarf Make Me Look Fat?

I'm really hoping this slims down my thighs, hips, and tummy. 

Special Report: Cozies & Covers...why?

This is a banana Cosie & 2 apple cozies.  The purpose of these items is still unknown but tonight's Special Report will go more indepth into the redonkulousness that is: The Cosie.

I was presented a request by one of my Stitch n' Bitchers, Tabby.  Her request was for me to do a piece on "Egg Sweaters".  Y'know, those egg cosies that look like little sweaters on eggs...even though no one eats Poached, or Prodded, or what ever kind of eggs those are that you put on golf tees.

Well, I decided to make this special report on the "COSIE PHENOMENON" in general.  Back in the dark ages, before there were microwaves and electric tea kettles, people used "Regular" tea kettles to heat their tea water for afternoon tea.  They would transfer this water into a ceramic, glass, or metal kettle (tee-hee, that rhymes).  To keep the water from going cold quickly, they would make Covers or the more cutsie term "Cosies" to help insulate the kajiggers.  From there, people would make cosies to keep many things warm, like their warmed egg thinggies.  Eventually, housewives who knit or crocheted would find themselves with a little too much free-time.  Too much free-time begets bordom, bordom begets creativeness, creativeness begets this:

 

Seriously, I can't drink from something that looks like a car.  Too many bad memories of my days in driver's training.  

Sorry, *ahem* from there, it has now become an obsession with knitters and crocheter's alike.  It's like giving a teenager a wad of money because you're leaving for the weekend and you're trusting them alone with the house.  You can tell them all you want not to blow the money on stuff they don't need & junk food..let alone no parties...but you know you're going to come home to pizza boxes and bags from all sorts of shops in the mall!  Like yarn-a-holics, we have spare yarn that WE SWEAR WE ARE GOING TO DONATE TO CHARITY BECAUSE OUR STASH IS TOO BIG, but you know we just saw this really sweet JAVA JACKET with cute lil' flower applique's!!

There is a point where this becomes too much free time and not enough productivity.  So please, don't let friends have too much free time.  Cosies are the first sign of yarn addiction and an intervention of the person's Stitch n' Bitch group and their yarn store manager.  With a little time and tough love, they will be back to making afghans, sweaters (for people, not food), and mayhaps an accessory or two.

I leave you with a few gems.